Back in July, I had a coupon (I mean…of course I did) and bought the largest canvas that would fit into my car (3′ x 4′)…all because I found a $15 easel.

Started here:

Then flipped it over…which, it turns out, is becoming an ongoing concern for this canvas…

This thing feels HUGE…So. Much. Acreage.

I add layers…

Sometimes subtle…sometimes not…

“What we learned here is love tastes bitter when it’s gone.” – Rt

Yes…that is the last sighting of my ex’s self-portrait…

Buried…

There is some anger coming out, says I…

“So go on and cry me a river
Don’t say this will haunt you forever
It never did, it never will.”

– Alter Bridge

“I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain
‘Cause human beings are destined to radiate or drain
What line do we stand upon, ’cause from here it looks the same
And only scars remain”

-Ed Sheeran

There is so much emotion I’m painting on here…

Turning it different directions keeps it from getting stale.

“You never loved me. You just loved how much I loved you.

– Mother!

Brought the bright back and started feeling the blood-rage, I think…

The glazing process involves some ugly phases before the luminous qualities start to show…

And here I left it while I spent my holidays in Las Vegas with some dear friends.

After I returned home on the 5th, I kept at it:

And the texture makes me swoon…so I decided to go in a completely different direction.

I feel like this is coming to some sort of finale pretty soon…

It’s winding down…I feel it…

AND…here it is on my wall. Replacing the “zombie girl” (me) that my ex painted.

This is too cool.

With the lights on:

I love it.

I’ve learned so much from making this. Not the least is discovering that Golden brand glazing liquid is slow drying while Liquitex brand glazing medium is not.

It is also quite likely that I will never record a(n even partly) step by step photo record of a canvas again.

Yes, I have started another canvas already. It will be for my very best friend of 35-ish years; my Anjo.

This blog has been out here on the interwebs for 6 years now.

I have posted on this blog 99 times before now, so this this my 100th post…about my first canvas.

I love it. I do love it.

Thank you.

Edit: This painting has a name.

“Shrike”

After the Hozier song, which fits Fucking Idiot to a T. In it, the shrike does everything I always wanted him to do, but in the end, he just wants to hang all of his shit on me (the thorn).

I love it even more with a title.